Let's Talk Confidence: My Thoughts + Tips

In our society, there's always an ideal body image. This ideal changes over the years, from being thin to being 'slim-thick'. Honestly, seeing these ideals, especially as a young woman on social media every day, can be damaging. Don't get me wrong, the girls who fit those ideals are gorgeous, however, it's unhealthy and unattainable to aspire to look exactly like them. Every single person has a unique body, one that is meant to look the way it does, not look like a carbon copy of somebody else's. I think it's so important, especially when setting health and fitness goals, to set them to be your best self...not to aspire to have somebody else's body type. This unachievable aspiration to look identical to someone else can majorly damage self-esteem and quite honestly, I've been there and it isn't worth it.

I have insecure days, lots actually. Days when I wish that my tummy was a bit flatter or I had a different sized chest. I have days when I compare myself to every Instagram model I see, or even just other girls I know in real life and question "why don't I look like her?". It's hard to have images of a certain body type deemed the most desirable by society flooding your head and feed constantly while simultaneously trying to build your confidence and self-esteem.

Saying, that I've been working on building my confidence and here are some tangible things that have helped:

1. Exercise // I feel more confident when I know I'm putting time and effort into my body because it deserves to be strong.

2. Dance Parties // It sounds a little weird, I know, but getting ready (or unready) for the day and dancing in front of the mirror to your favourite songs can be a huge confidence (and mood) booster.

3. Have an uplifting circle // Fill your circle of friends with people who value and cherish you for who you are (and that will be your personal hype crew)!

4. Use kind words with yourself // If you catch yourself thinking negatively, try and stop in your tracks and swap that out for something positive. It's important to tell yourself what you love about yourself.

5. Write down when you feel confident and why // I think it can be so helpful to write down when you're feeling confident and the reason for it, that way you're able to look back on it when you need to remember how you felt!

I'm still in the process of building my own confidence. I feel like I'll always be striving to be more confident in myself and there will never be a day when I say "yup, this is as confident as I ever want to be", there is no final destination. How can there be a final destination, when your body is constantly changing and you can find new things about yourself to admire every day? Now, having just turned 20, I feel like my confidence has grown so much in the past year. I know that I am valuable, intelligent and beautiful. I have that mindset that only people who respect me and think highly of me should be in my life. Instead of asking myself "why don't I look like her?", I'm starting to say "she's really pretty, but so am I". I've started to value my own opinions more and other's opinions less. I'm realizing there is no 'ideal body' that I need to achieve, other than the strongest version of my own. I'm still working to believe these things every single day, but I'm so proud of how far I've come in my self-love journey and am going to continue every day.

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